SAFARI - Gullible Travels - South Africa

Gulliver's Travels is a classic adventure story (in reality, a misadventure story) involving several voyages of Lemuel Gulliver, a ship's surgeon. Gullible Travels, a BullShip´s forensic, not a joke.

My blast in South Africa, the best Safari maximum experience out there! You will be blown away! Multimillion National Geographic does not stand a chance. You will love my adventure junkie extravaganza, in your face!

Get the South Africa Safari Maximum Experience DELUXE

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/121611

Gulliver's Travels, on the other hand, is a classic adventure story (in reality, a misadventure story) involving several voyages of Lemuel Gulliver, a ship's surgeon, who, because of a series of mishaps en route to recognized ports, ends up, instead, on several unknown islands living with people and animals of unusual sizes, behaviors, etc ….

Gullible Travels, on one and only hand, is just its updated millionaire´s version, nothing more, and nothing less! South Africa is one of the many bonuses of a BullShip´s forensic, a lion, with no mercy, not a joke.

The results of my research or mighty RA RA RA SURGE have found some moral values in Gullible Travels: commitment to something greater than oneself, self respect, but with humbleness or respect to others, self-discipline, and acceptance of personal responsibility, respect and caring for others, even a dangerous animal. Gullible represents the middle ground between pure reason and pure animalism.

Where have you been, folks? I haven´t seen you around, for quite a while now? No likes, no more like for me! Why, why, but why? What´s going on? What´s going wrong? Oh, my, I still don´t get it, wink, wink! I´m bored out of my pioneering skull typing my hurting last arm off on this endlessly, thank God, dying 15 year old Acer minilaptop, hoping they will throw some nickle at me for free publicity.

I´m Gullible, a real animal, keeping a low profile. My savage memories are like boring, wink, wink, teachers. Teachers with wild mood swings. Some are inspired, but most are just drudges or grudges. At least they don´t tell me student with honors about their sex lives, ugh! My terror school is a huge factory, like a sweatshop, nightmare scenario, I sweat a lot doing all the necessary tasks, like plugging my old unreadable books I haven´t marketed since 2010 or 2011, you know those wet market dreams, don´t you? Don´t try to nail the weird professor just because he´s not cut from the same cloth as you! I didn´t type this, my fingers did.

A sweet slacker, so unpredictable, I started being a therapist, but over time the cost became prohibitive and I stopped doing that shit. I found my annoying clients to be useful, but after their first hundred sessions, they were pretty sure that I hadn´t sorted out all or any of my issues without going to a therapist, being one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I still need to talk to people about my bad, bad, really bad, exciting problems. No wink, wink.

Stupid little me, like I loved misanthropy, it didn’t really occur to me that there are people who are far worse off than me. Yet I took their sympathy for me, I had to, because I charged them $200 an hour for my psycho shock therapy. Believe me, I felt guilty of the imposter syndrome. I wasn´t depressed enough! If you ask me how I´m doing, which you never do, I´m always great, happy, loving life, banging my time machine, traveling the world, selling my DELUXE Special Limited editions like hot cakes, shit like that, but, underneath, things aren´t so rosy. I need help, but not a therapist, seriously.

Oh, you haven´t noticed how I´ve been finger-tripping my painfully worn-out globe, flying my BullShip from Iceland, and Russia to Cambodia and Oman, have you? I hope you didn´t like my handsome bodyguard posing stone-cold or mad in the cockpit in Oman, because I ordered him to pose exclusively for my Substack readers, cheese, remember my Omen plane that almost crashed, or how he smiles, lemon, in the picture with the two elephants in Cambodia, because the boss ordered him to smile. That lad is on my payroll. The fucking dude is mine, that fresh meat in my meatgrinder. You know what I mean.

Ok, I threw in the female element in that picture for fear porn lovers. Like a boss, you know. Would you believe that he is a real killer, a serial killer, that´s why I hired him? Alrite, alrite, at least a natural-born thriller. Anyway, forget about him, the dude is mine, I told you, don´t blink. I mean he´s my fucking expensive bodyguard! Bu bu but you can get a lot of him in all my current and future DELUXE Special Limited Editions available for purchase, to you, with love, 20 bucks each. You don´t have to like him, or me for that matter. Just buy my shit!

Yep, I have a shitload of immortalized memories from around the world you can only dream about. No offence, no, I´m not mocking you or bragging about my unconventional, cosmopolitan lifestyle, like really! It´s not my fault that my time machine is this crazy, making me going places, giving me actual photographs of those particular countries, off the charts, man! Or is it, my fault? You must know, you tell me!

You can´t blame a poor bastard who´s kind of starving here in the volcanic jungle, without medicine, praying for the blessed computer to go on, to never give up, to hold on, to hang on, for me, gotta pay the astronomical Internet bill, that´s why all the fucking DELUXE editions in your callous face, gotta make a living, bra! Who doesn´t want to go to Iceland, Russia, Cambodia, Oman, and many more countries for measly 20 bucks? You tell me, not kidding!

Don´t get me wrong, I love the Subtack gays Brent and Michael Going Places, or something, how they spend “only” 80 grand a year traveling! WTF, gays? With that amount of money my shabby $2 flip-flop Ferrari I walk driving me nuts, err, time machine would take me all across the whole fucking trans universe! And I´m selling my shit for 20 bucks, without even managing to sell anything, ROFL! WTF, bra, there´s something wrong with me, so terribly wrong. I´m folding it.

But still, 20 bucks? OK, OK, OK, KKK, KO, KO, KO, so let´s bargain! 19? 18? 10? 2? Fuck U2! Fuck U2, I never liked that whining Irish biatch Bono playing a free concert in the Kiev subway against the Nutzie Ukraine war when his Union Jackass Britain had started the whole aggression against Russia, along with the United Satanic America! Or that fucking princess Sean Penn lending his Oscar to the most honest lady in high heels, Lady Gaga type, lol, on earth, Mr Green, Grinch, Grunch? Seanny, Penny, rest assured you won´t see your Hollywood fake Oscar again, never again, baby, just like Holocaust, it will be blown to smithereens, bitch!

If you don´t laugh, at least a bit, you´re not my friend! Spilling my deathwish coffee first thing in the morning, spewing it everywhere. No, I´m talking about you because I drink only delicious volcanic rain water, a sulfur reign on my drifting soul, very healthy, you can tell, right? Recommend me, my Subtract!

Pushing my emotions back and trying to keep myself busy with my Substack screaming for help, with my MAGA phone like a spectrum, like a kaleidoscope, and failing to reach out to my fans for a chat, because I´m preocuppied with traveling the world to impress the fauna and flora of the Nicaraguan wilderness, supressing my wildness and free speech that are expensive, deciding to tell you only what I feel comfortable with, ultimately oppressing your democracy through my dictatorship. Because I dictate. Because I don´t have a secretary, not even a secretary, can you believe that, imagine a sexy type to type for me, whoops. Typing is the worst pain in the ass, especially now that my frickin mouse, Mickey Mouse, lol, stopped working. What a brain breakthrough lifestyle, brainstormed! Close your mouth, swallow, keep breathing, I should shut up, but I´m not done, not yet! I didn´t type this, my fingers did! Nobody obeys me. WTF, I´m the boss. Like a boss!

At a time when so many objective truths are being called into question, or worse, vilified, it must be wonderful to come across a gem like this piece. You should be grateful for my neurons that keep such memories intact, because lies, whether subjective or universal, rule this sick world, however psychoanalyzed. Am I not right? Am I lying on behalf of a false travel ideology? Then prove me wrong, or keep reading, lol! Self-delusion is a powerful drug. I´m tripping, I´m tripping. I´m tripping over my shit I just can´t dodge. Memories are sharp pieces on the chessboard, they cut, they make you bleed, inmate, check, more bad blood spilled, inmate, check, checkmate!

Fantastic! I am one happy drifter falling parachuteless in South Africa. R U FOOKING KIDDING ME? NO $HIT! I can´t make this shit up, you can´t make this shit up, but here we are in South Africa, for real! The cradle of humanity, the cradle of filth. It´s a fallen world, so what?

Let me splain. You like my slang, vernacular, I can tell. Anyway, as I was told by my shady travel agency, that I could do a lot of Safari in South Africa, you know wildlife and shit, while making snuff videos. R U FOOKING KIDDING ME? A type of film that shows, or purports to show, scenes of actual homicide. You have a criminal mind, not a criminal record, oh man! Are you an animal, too? Not bigger than me, pal.

I tripped my lucid head over a fallen star, I really did, asking this insane question: Was the massacre of over 700 civilians at Bucha perpetrated by the Ukrainian National Police and the Safari Unit and Azov Battalion? Apparently, I was a bit perplexed, as I always jump to conclusions, and off my cliff.

I heard disturbing echoes, my unsupported world or evidence was spinning out of control. They went like this:

“Remember.

1. There was no massacre in Bucha.

2. The massacre in Bucha, which did not happen, was carried out by Nazi Ukrainians.

3. The massacre in Bucha, which did not happen and was carried out by Nazi Ukrainians was because they were on top of a bioweapons lab.

4. The massacre in Bucha, on top of a bioweapons lab and carried out by Ukrainians, which did not happen was a false flag by George Soros.

Rinse, repeat. Doesn't take much for the brain-dead Putinites in the West lol”

“It's very likely that Ukrainian Nutzies managed to sneak through Russian-controlled skies and dropped their paratroopers behind enemy lines to massacre some civilians. After this they went back to Mariupol and acted like they were encircled the whole time.

What was the purpose? To blame the massacre on Russian peacekeepers who lost Bucha region just few weeks after killings.”

“FYI, a safari is pretty much a brutal manhunt, WTF?”

“Really looks like a horror movie!”

And you paid for that, happily ever after, Merrykan guys, 50, 100 billions! Your tax dollars sponsored this once-in-a-lifetime safari experience, WOW! No wink, no sink, just blink, blink, and frozen blood, a lot of it.

No, I don´t have a DELUXE edition of that kind of safari because my Omen plane wasn´t granted permission to land on the most bizarre, “totally legit” war crime scene, because I´m a forensic, not just a poet and philosopher, Rasputin, Mr Bean, etc and determine everything death like 1,2,3. I am made to keep a low profile, a matter of life and death. Damn, overall, that was a very democratic safari I could really live without!

Am I trying to make any point? Like the point I made about the difference between guns and gun owners. However, in actuality, neither guns nor gun owners kill people ... bullets kill people. No, I am not being facetious here. Of course, time kills people, time kills everything, even killing time.

Beware, I do have the South Africa DELUXE edition. I spent some hefty time and money there. You´re gonna splurge 30 bucks on me, on my Africa, aren´t you? You will love my safari, it´s a blast! I´ve never shown these VIP pictures to anybody. They´re straight from my secret photo vault, a huge international treasure non-UNESCO landmark, the ninth or tenth wonder of the world, man. You wouldn´t buy it even for thousands of dollars, because there is no animal like me, I have a good eye, my camera is rolling, baby! They say I have this special ability to communicate with animals, ruling them. You forgot I´m a lion, with a divine connection. Re-read my post DEFUND UKRAINE, FUND NICARAGUA, ERR, ME, but you never listen, you keep on funding Ukraine, not me!

A safari is a journey. In the broadest sense, to go on safari is simply to travel, not kill unarmed civilians. More specifically, a safari is a journey that involves going into nature to watch wild animals, not watch people die violent, savage deaths, and brag about it on the Internet backing it up with the most gruesome snuff video out there promoting democracy, spreading that shit like a sandwich, like some unholy stigmata plague, man! I saw it in the Main Stream Media, where else? I´m so mainstream, damn!

On safari in Africa. The roots of the word safari are Arabic, but the modern concept of a safari originated in Africa. That´s why I went to Africa, where the classical idea of the wildlife safari becomes an amazing reality. It´s the ultimate thing to do, to observe free-roaming wildlife, not hunting it. Unless you are some spoiled rich brat or fuck to do just that, hunt, kill.

Not me, you will never see me in any DELUXE edition. Who do you think is behind the camera, behind the sorry scenes, behind the enemy lines? My bodyguard, my fucking bodyguard, what the bloody fuck, that lucky SOB, is getting all the fame on Substack, he stars in those DELUXE editions I´m hopelessly pedaling like a professional beggar. FFS, I hope he won´t start charging me! No worries, wink, wink, I will order him not to, I´m broke anyway because nobody´s buying my great, wink, wink, stuff! Nah, I love him! That guy saved my life, already twice. I´m in the dangerous business of telling the truth, the way I see it, it is what it is. That bodyguard rocks my big balls. Because I´m the boss here, like a boss! LOL! No matter he´s a professional killer, err, a natural-born thriller, which I´m not. Relax, I´m just a serial killer, a totally different thing, wink, wink, don´t hold your breath, don´t blink! You fucking blinked!

Integrity is being taught in my schools, schools, plural, both new and old, remember I´m the professor you want to nail, I told you not to! Insanity will never take its place. Well, at least it´s what I wish for. My integrity and sanity are still beyond a joke. You should thank me for making them seem so funny, so entertaining, so damn good, so interesting! It´s like buy or die, lol! I just made this shit up, I can´t believe it, man! I´m so cool, so bada$$, like a cop without a bulletproof vest, like a boss! So much iconic resilience, perseverance, oh man! I´ve never seen a cheaper bitch, this dirty cheap, bang! You´ll get a great bang for your buck. Hurry, hurry faster before my multiple entry/multiple exit visa or noble arse expires. No STD, bra! Either way, you wear a helmet, or a hazmat suit, your heart on your sleeve as I do. Not like a boss.

And don´t forget to bargain on my books if you need a bulk, make your very best offer, I´m very considerate, we all don´t have money, we just don´t, I do understand that in these really bad, difficult times. And remember, fuck U2, yeah, fuck U2, that sissy Bono from the Irish band gets under my cringy Jewish skin, he´s supporting the Nutzie Nazi cyborgs.

I have to calm the fook down, I´m the boss here, the cunning professor teaching his stunning, jaw-dropping wildlife memories, teachers with wild mood swings, in your class, in your face, his Gullible Travels, sticking it in your local IMAX multiplex that has already become your shrine, painting the town, philosophically. There´s a moral to the moron of the story, which is shockingly always me, me, me, the real nobody behind the camera, the one-armed pirate on the drunken sea of a safari, your safari. Obviously. Or I wouldn´t even bother to write anything, if I wasn´t in it. Everything is well-thought out, it must be, I´m a perfectionist, with many flaws. I´m not perfect. It wouldn´t be me, a fucking forensic, a grave digger, a traveler in time, Gullible, a real animal, bigger than you. You´d better sober up and get my shit straight!

Because I´m Gullible. “Adventure junkie” sounds too modern, like I´m smoking weed, which I´m not. I´m old school, with a new approach, but you have already noticed. Be my fan if you like what I do and how I do it. I am classic. Stick with me despite the fact I´m going nowhere. I belong here, I belong to the wilderness, my natural habitat. All I need is strength I somehow start to lack to keep laying out my priceless travelogues. So don´t weaken me any further by not buying my DELUXE editions worth every dime, I´m threatening you, wink, wink!

My bombastic trip to Africa is primarily aimed at watching and photographing wildlife in the bush, for fun, err, for you, your 30 dollars, food´s up. Don´t blink! Don´t wink! OK, OK, OK, KKK, KO, KO, KO, I´ve got shit for brains. My hurting fingers have created these wildlife memories. Actually, I hate typing my boiling mind off, but, you know, neccesity is the most promiscuous mother to all fucking inventions, in cold blood. Oops, did I just do that? Nope! Nope, I didn´t type this, my fingers did. My hungry fingers create memories, they always will, no matter all the destruction. My tired, or tiresome, fingers, replete with blisters, create food for thought. Gluttony much? Are you paying attention, thirsty student?

Gulliver's Travels, on the other hand, is a classic adventure story (in reality, a misadventure story) involving several voyages of Lemuel Gulliver, a ship's surgeon, who, because of a series of mishaps en route to recognized ports, ends up, instead, on several unknown islands living with people and animals of unusual sizes, behaviors, etc ….

Gullible Travels, on one and only hand, is just its updated version, nothing more, and nothing less! South Africa is one of the many bonuses of a BullShip´s forensic. It´s not a joke. The conclusion is a disturbingly unsettled narrative, filtering experience through Gullible's increasingly exacerbated vision. From the moment he becomes attached to the little tiger, there seems to be no possibility of Gullible's returning to a complacent, unknowing self. Wandering and wodering, he´s left with only one last question, and one inquiry only:

MY LITTLE TIGER, MY PRECIOUS CAT, DO YOU KNOW OF ANY FOUNDER DONOR OR MEMBER TO COVER MY GULLIBLE TRAVELS EXPENSES, NOW PILED UP, AND STILL SKYROCKETING? BECAUSE SCIENCE´S DEMIGOD FUCKCHEE (Fauci=Fuckcheater) HAS NO FUCKING CLUE! SOOO SORRY FOR MY FOUL LANGUAGE, LITTLE TIGER, AND FOR THE MTF´S JAB, I FORGET YOU´RE JUST A CUB!

Damn, I feel better now, I got the WW3 shit off my chest, and without shrooms, or mushroom clouds. I´m lucky, just like Sherluck Holmes, because I investigate, I do research, I will spell it for ya, ya dumbass, RA RA RA SURGE! Research! That simple. See, my complex issues are not that bad. I´m only going nuclear in South Africa, no big deal, wink, wink! Actually, I´m getting over them just reaching out and looking for like-minded individuals in a safe space that Subtract is to open up and live my best life!

It´s a strange and wacky world out there, spun into a morass of despair, more of my a$$ ….

Did my boosted, unvaxxed, overflowing ego type this? Nope, it didn´t, my last fingers did.

I will add many more pictures of my South Africa safari adventure spree to this free teaser in two hours because of the email length limit, but I encourage you to purchase my private DELUXE Special Limited Edition to get the full experience of the best safari out there now available to the general public worldwide for only 30 dollars, supporting my hard work in Nicaragua. Thank you.

Get the South Africa Safari Maximum Experience DELUXE

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/121611

MY PAST WORK, all available for purchase!

Get Cradle Of Filth, Hallowed Be! https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/121158

Get Ember Signs Of The Alien Nation https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/121131

Get Bohemian Nemesis At Stake https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/121095

Get the Oman DELUXE edition https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/121081

Get USA United Satanic America https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120780

Get Drown Towards Twilight Beauty https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120745

Get Death LiveD (Dark Hymns Of Suffering) https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120635

Get The Libertine https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120618

Get I Wish If Only If Only https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120606

Get Trespassing Deep Sins Of Barbed Fate https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120600

Get No Grave Robbery Of All (The Cure) https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120569

Get Sagittarius Total Eclipse https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/120542

Get the Cambodia DELUXE https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/119981

Get the Iceland In Bloom DELUXE https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/119042

Get the Russian Metro DELUXE https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/119617

Get Wielding EndTime Divine, Scythed https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/e/119026

It takes me my whole life to crank the handle as I do and this level of commitment is only made possible through donation and subscription income. Share my hard work on your social media and across this platform if you find it worthy, spread my word around! I am most grateful for all your maximum support and privileged to have you as my reader. Thank you.

SUBSCRIBE ON BUYMEACOFFEE ONLY: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF/membership

ONLY $ 7 a month, $ 70 a year

DONATE: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralF

ANY AMOUNT YOU CAN ……