Sk8er A B C D Luv Flip Alphuckbet
Oh, the other day he saw a sizzling hot gal skating the hell out of his heart balls byrd, her bard, she was so fucking cool n pretty. She knew her shit, man, how to impress a skating champion of malls
He was Nutty, her Nutty. She was Shelly, his Shelly, they were squirrels. There was a little problem, though. Nutty had to sell cheap his youth skateboard collection before he could start showing off as a world superstar on Substakes, burning it down with her fame and glory. He wasn´t crashing malls anymore, the malls were crashing him, now limping, feeling he didn´t mind, he wasn´t sorry, he was happy, a retired or retard flip-flop nobody homebody. That´s how he became Nutty, an amateur, an amortour improvising, maneuvering in the crater of luv, on the skate ramp, beneath the lava surface, without a skateboard, kissing Shelly´s adorable ass n other yummy caketuary parts, a fair game, hard work, fair play, totally in luv n sync with the breathtaking gal n her awesome sk8board, poor boi.
N Shelly? Ooh, she´s aaahmazing, what´s not to luv about her? Shelly is a different story, out of this world, out of my league, n n n n n n n n n I´m leaking, OMG OMG, baby, phuck, I didn´t know league and leak were interchangeable, synonyms, it´s a luv jelly sin, baby! Shelly is jelly, like jealousy or Pelosi or something. Will Nutty get jelly like Covid? Phuck, baby, mask me! Shelly came across my soul safe as MBS. No, oh no, no no no no no, not Mohammed bin Salman Al Saud, Crown Prince and Prime Minister of Saudi Arabia, the chairman of the Council of Economic and Development Affairs and the chairman of the Council of Political and Security Affairs.
Shelly is MBS, the Mercenary Breaching Squirrel, an expert on breaching through doors and walls using her shotguns. With her exothermic torch she´s able to cut through any steel or reinforced wall to take a peek inside. Nothing can stop this nutting squirrel from getting in or out, she does as she pleases, she´s so fucking cool n pretty! I love her shooting me, I love her squirreling me, I love her skateboarding me in n out, in n out, in n out. I´m fainting, faint with me, baby!
Going incognito, undercover, she´s a total pro squirrel who just loves to feed the birds, oops. WHAT? Phuck, baby! Eh, ahem, err, eh, she was an impressionist parodying all Nutty´s past, present n future successes or sex excesses making her new life even more exciting n interesting than his. He would love to get behind her on her sk8 bored, holding her tight, whispering her his silly luv poetry, smelling her hair, biting her ears, licking her neck n shoulders until she got ablaze n shivered n allowed him in to take her from behind, to take them to heaven, over n over n over again.
I can´t stop recommending skateboarding, the sport or activity two do on a skateboard. Skateboarding romantically up and down the skate parks of luv is encouraged if you´re nuts about me, squirrel! Last time I checked, I´m nuts about you, baby. It´s like walking in the clouds with Mary Jane, soaring up the volcano before multiple eruptions. Incurable romantics call it “milk truck frucking royally”. But I dunno, I´ll stick with my Milka chocolate anxiety.
You´re not scared suddenly, are you? Come on, it´s just an action sport that involves riding n performing tricks using a skateboard, as well as a recreational activity, an art form, an entertainment industry job n a method of transportation, FFS! Somebody´s gotta drive the fucking skateboard, or we´re gonna crash, no matter how bored you are, baby, I lost my glasses. Aaaaaah, aaaah, ah, I´m fainting, faint with me, the skateboard is fucked anyway, baby! CRASH!!!
Yeah, that dead serious sizzling hot gal skated the hell out of his heart balls byrd, her bard, whenever she wanted. WOWEE! Yeah, that dead serious sizzling hot gal who skated the hell out of his heart balls byrd, her bard, whenever she pleased, was so fucking cool n pretty, as I told you baby spilling my marbles. What could I do? She knew her shit, man, how to impress a skating champion of malls, poor boi, such a fucking toy, like me. He couldn´t keep up, he just couldn´t keep it up all the time, poor boi, Sk8er Boi, her only joy! Phuck, baby!
A luv alphuckbet is an organic food chain set of graphs or characters used to represent the phuckmimic structure of a luv language n its nutrients. In most luv alphuckbets, the characters are arranged in a definite order or sequence (e.g., A, B, C, D, etc), just in case, when you don´t know what to do, or how to do it. Beginners should always start with X, practicing it tirelessly XXX XXX XXX, or Z, practicing it heavily ZZZZZ ZZZZZ ZZZZZ! The luv alphuckbet ain´t easy, it´s fucking hard, man!
Shelly was an expert on demand, always aiming to facilitate me real-time ad-vice, guy-dance n ass-istance from her pro e-xxx-purr-tease, possessing specialized knowledge and skills Nutty lacked or forgot n required, only to improve his overall oxytocin productivity and enhance employee engagement before wedding. He was such a crazy chap, Sk8er Boi, such a fucking toy, Shelly´s only joy.
N n n n n n now these three fast n furious sorry gurls - Avril, Iggy n Ariana, AH, are fighting over n for one black ghetto dude? WT MAD COWS! Baby, pack it up, we´re out of here, let´s get the fuck out of here!
He was a boy
She was a girl
Can I make it any more obvious?
He was a punk
She did ballet
What more can I say?
He wanted her
She'd never tell
Secretly she wanted him as well
But all of her friends
Stuck up their nose
They had a problem with his baggy clothes
He was a skater boy
She said, "See you later, boy"
He wasn't good enough for her
She had a pretty face
But her head was up in space
She needed to come back down to earth
Five years from now
She sits at home
Feeding the baby, she's all alone
She turns on TV
Guess who she sees
Skater boy rockin' up MTV
She calls up her friends
They already know
And they've all got tickets to see his show
She tags along
And stands in the crowd
Looks up at the man that she turned down
He was a skater boy
She said, "See you later, boy"
He wasn't good enough for her
Now he's a super star
Slammin' on his guitar
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?
He was a skater boy
She said, "See you later, boy"
He wasn't good enough for her
Now he's a super star
Slammin' on his guitar
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?
Sorry, girl, but you missed out
Well, tough, luck that boy's mine now
We are more than just good friends
This is how the story ends
Too bad that you couldn't see
See the man that boy could be
There is more that meets the eye
I see the soul that is inside
He's just a boy
And I'm just a girl
Can I make it any more obvious?
We are in love
Haven't you heard
How we rock each other's world
I'm with the skater boy
I said, "See you later, boy"
I'll be back stage after the show
I'll be at a studio
Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know
I'm with the skater boy
I said, "See you later, boy"
I'll be back stage after the show
I'll be at a studio
Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know
Uh-huh!
It's Iggy Iggs!
I got one more problem with you girl, hey!
Hey baby, even though I hate ya, I wanna love ya (I want you)
And even though I can't forgive ya, I really want to (I want you)
Tell me, tell me, baby, why can't you leave me?
'Cause even though I shouldn't want it, I gotta have it (I want you)
Head in the clouds
Got no weight on my shoulders
I should be wiser, and realize that I've got
One less problem without ya
I got one less problem without ya
I got one less problem without ya (I got one less, one less problem)
Problem, problem, problem (I got one less, one less problem)
Let's go
I know you're never gonna wake up
I gotta give up (but it's you)
I know I shouldn't ever call back or let you come back (but it's you)
Every time you touch me and say you love me, I get a little bit breathless
I shouldn't want it (but it's you)
Head in the clouds
Got no weight on my shoulders
I should be wiser, and realize that I've got
One less problem without ya
I got one less problem without ya
I got one less problem without ya (I got one less, one less problem)
Problem, problem, problem (I got one less, one less problem)
It's Iggy Iggs!
Uh, what you got?
Smart money bettin' I'll be better off without you
In no time I'll be forgettin' all about you
You sayin' that you know but I really, really doubt you understand
My life is easy when I ain't around you
Iggy Iggy, too big to be here stressin'
I'm thinkin' I love the thought of you more than I love your presence
And the best thing now is probably for you to exit
I let you go, let you back, I finally learned my lesson
No half-stepping, either you want it or you just playin'
I'm listenin' to you knowin' I can't believe what you're sayin'
There's a million yous, baby boo, so don't be dumb
I got 99 problems but you won't be one
Like what
Mm-mm na-na-na (one less, one less problem)
Mm-mm, yeah (one less, one less problem)
Head in the clouds
Got no weight on my shoulders
I should be wiser, and realize that I've got
One less problem without ya (hey)
I got one less problem without ya (no, babe)
I got one less problem without ya (ooh, ooh, baby) (I got one less, one less problem)
Problem, problem, problem (I got one less, one less problem, problem)
Hey
I got one less, one less, yeah (I got one less, one less problem)
Ooh, my life is so excitingly boring withou you! Ahoo, I can´t fucking skate with or without you. Unless you love me shooting you, unless you love me squirreling you, unless you love me skateboarding you in n out, in n out, in n out. I´m fainting, faint with me,´cause I´ve bought you Pistachio nuts, baby! You´re not selling your shelly, are you? It´s fucking mine, WTF! Fine, baby, I´m eating your P, Pistachio nuts, anxious anxious anxious here!
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THE SUBSTACK VERSION WILL BE UPDATED WITH MORE PUNK IMAGERY!
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https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lsouralf
I AM NUTS ABOUT YOU SQUIRREL!!! 🐿💕