A Nerdish Ode To Slowness
In the rare condition known as tachysensia, one experiences a temporary distortion of time and sound, during which he gets the “fast feeling” that all is moving more rapidly than it actually is.
Is that why he wants and needs her? To make them two, not one, to slow him down? People with tachysensia experience episodes where everything appears to be speeding up, and sounds become unusually loud. These episodes are short in duration, usually lasting no more than 10 minutes, and unpredictable in nature, making them difficult to study. He does not have it but wants every body within his reach to think about it …
Now that I have captured your attention
I wanna steal you for a rhythm intervention
Mr. TSA, I'm ready for inspection
Sh-sh-show me how you make a first impression
Oh, oh
Can we take it nice and slow, slow?
Break it down and drop it low, low
'Cause I just wanna party all night in the neon lights
'Til you can't let me go
I just wanna feel your body right next to mine
All night long
Baby, slow down the song
And when it's coming closer to the end, hit rewind
All night long
Baby, slow down the song
Yeah, baby, slow down the song
Yeah, baby, slow down the song
If you want me, I'm accepting applications
So long as we can keep this record on rotation
You know I'm good with mouth-to-mouth resuscitation
Breathe me in, breathe me out
So amazing
Oh, oh
Can we take it nice and slow, slow?
Break it down and drop it low, low
'Cause I just wanna party all night in the neon lights
'Til you can't let me go
I just wanna feel your body right next to mine
All night long
Baby, slow down the song
And when it's coming closer to the end, hit rewind
All night long
Baby, slow down the song
Yeah, baby, slow down the song
Yeah, baby, slow down the song
Breathe me in, breathe me out
The music's got me going
Breathe me in, breathe me out
No stopping 'til the morning
Breathe me in, breathe me out
You know I'm ready for it
For it, for it
Yeah
Breathe me in, breathe me out
The music's got me going
Breathe me in, breathe me out
No stopping 'til the morning
Breathe me in, breathe me out
You know I'm ready for it
For it, for it
Yeah
I just wanna feel your body right next to mine
All night long
Baby, slow down the song
And when it's coming closer to the end, hit rewind
All night long
Baby, slow down the song
Yeah, baby, slow down the song
Yeah, baby, slow down the song
How do I do it?
(It's The Cataracs)
Hahaha
Professor Dixie, the poetic philosopher, is a bit perplexed here. He needs some help from his smoking-hot A+++ student crush, like intense private lessons or something, anything, like LollipoP, or ice cream, at worst. Is Selena Gomez using a fast song as a clever and refined metaphor to rough sex we both hate? When she says "baby slow down the song", is she telling the boy to slow down? Then in the part where she says something about rewinding, the man has hit climax like a truck, he has ejaculated and she wants to go back to the beginning so she can feel all that pleasure again, right? Weird. Oh my goodness, this Selena Gomez wants to give this old man a heart attack! Somebody call the Phire Department and an ambulance, not the coroner, ya dopes, please! The Dixie State University is really in flames … WHAT THE LUCK!
Or, lyrically, the inelegant nerd song sings about slowing down time and living in one magical moment on the dance floor. The sexpressive couple is just dancing and having platonic fun. N she just enjoys it so much that she does not want that romantic moment to go, n she wants to slow down the graceless nerd song so it would last longer than the embarrassing quickie, oops. Bu bu but this kinda phunny interpretation may be marked as poor, for being too decent. Weird.
Or, she has already lost her virginity, OMG OMG, WHY WHY BUT WHY, AND HOW, NO WAY, NO WAY, NO FUCKING WAY! None of my business, right? Weird. But she must still be greatly inexperienced, despite knowing the crazed ins and outs of melodick sex. The first time probs went fast and now she is older, old enough to go clubbing with older guys, and wants a longer experience where they can do it over and over again, right? Weird. Her first time was obviously not up to par, Bieber, Bieber, poor Justin, which is why she is being so picky now. N she wants a more sensual experience, which is why she likens sex to a song, weird. Does she have shy Professor Dixie´s number, to slow down his fast levitation-meditation tempo? God forbid, he is taken! Oh no, oh no, a big fugly no! Somebody call the cops because Selena Gomez is jeopardizing celibate Professor Dixie´s Mission Impossible. Code Red, code Red, red code, red code! Red tape, red tape! Fine, Baby!
To live a fast life means to be reckless. To be spontaneous to the point of never thinking anything through to the end before doing it. It is with little or no regard for what one´s actions do to other people. To live fast and loose is a big and fat no-no! Pleading guilty is no good. Fast means happening, moving, or doing something at great speed. The speed at which changes and events occur no matter one claims that nothing will ever change one´s world. Like F1! Nope, it is not Fuck One. Weird.
Does it seem that life is moving faster and faster? Days and weeks and months pass in a flash. Life seems to be flying by at breakneck speed. Or, maybe it is not that life is moving faster and faster but that you are moving faster and faster through life. You are busier and busier … maybe busier than you have ever been. Responsibilities and expectations seem greater and greater, more and more. And, the margins of your life — those blank spaces where you can catch your breath, with him, — are getting smaller and smaller, fewer and fewer.
You sense that there is something unhealthy about this. Your justified ambitions are killing you. Your exhausted body tells you. Your over-stressed mind tells you, laughing at “Hurry Sickness” - Type A Behavior and Your Heart”, which is not an actual medical condition, but it is known as a sense of excessive time urgency. You may constantly feel rushed or anxious and have a feeling of urgency to get things done when there is no need. Your disquieted soul tells you. Is there a remedy?
Good news! There is! Professor Dixie primitively teaches some valuable lessons that help your hectic world slow down and that help you slow down in your hectic world. Instead of being preoccupied on your way to somewhere important, you are actually already there … at some important place with him, in that very special moment and in that wild space called Love, wide-open. And without Trump! Yes, your long-awaited galaxy, pure peace and quiet! Well, sort of. Like walking in the park while tripping over the clouds, holding hands the most romantically possible, smiling, the happiest two, not one, could ever be, making starry eyes, kissing in the rain. To cry another day. He talks to your beautiful soul, already his. He wants your beautiful body, not his yet. Is now when? A teacher-student, student-teacher Love affair! Feeling a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts. Seeing a kaleidoscope of images. Speaking the language of the heart they share only they know.
You are fixated on what is ahead. What issues have to be addressed for tomorrow? What opportunities have to be seized over there? What problems on the horizon have to be solved before you get there? You live so much in the planning mode that you do not find yourself very often in the present mode. Professor Dixie is reaching out to you, teaching you to slow down and to be present. Are you a good student? Do you really want to learn? Are you interested in impressing such a pensive soul, waxing poetic, boxing like a candle? Weird.
He is like an innocent explorer child. Children are better than adults at looking closely at little things, paying attention and imagining. They still have eyes of wonder and hearts of discovery. Is he trying to teach you to pay attention to the small treasures that are always at your feet if you will just open your eyes? No, he is not, you have already learned that. Well, you have almost discovered your Columbus, marooned in the broken heart of America, almost in the center of your universe. Whether or not you want to teach him how to behave, it is definitely time to relax, unwind, enjoy Professor Dixie, because busyness has already impacted your well-being!
The quick pace lifestyle pushes you to move quickly, do more, live faster. The results of that are you are often in the state of burnout, stress, mental health issues, sadness and unhappiness. But enough is really enough. As you get older, you have fewer new experiences and the world around you becomes more and more familiar. You become desensitized to your experience, which means that you process less information, and time seems to speed up. Focusing on time slows it down, does it not to last? The more you focus on time, the slower it seems to pass, which is usually the case when you are bored or doing something you´d rather not be doing.
If you feel life is going too fast, it is because you are too busy to enjoy it. You need to understand that you are only human and you are meant to actually enjoy the slow ride. Time is an illusion. There is always the now, the moment. The more you want to hold time, the more it slips away. The more you ride Professor Dixie, the slower and more gentle and merciful time gets. It can and will even get to a grinding halt, a complete state of bliss, SPLASH, you so deserve. A nerdish ode to slowness. A lovely ode to you. Quiet after the storm. An idyllic setting. An unspoiled experience. Pleasing and picturesque in natural simplicity. Be his!
Practicing mindfulness and self-awareness helps you live a slower, more intentional life, tune out distractions and focus on what truly matters. Spending time with your loved one, enjoying the simple pleasures of love life, that is. You may go slower, but you will go further!
Fine Baby needs to slow down! Ahem, you need to slow down if you want to get more pleasure out of your life, particularly during activities such as pondering, flirting or loving Professor Dixie. Because he is so academically original, so hot, so badass, so weird, so yummy!
Have you not been in such a big hurry all your life? In fact, the forever tyranny of busyness effects most people and never in a positive manner. They are so busy rushing from one activity to the next they either do not have time to love or they “love” on the run, in the car, at their computer working, or during some other save-the-world or art activity. This way of “loving” strips all of the pleasure from it. Love at first cosmic bite? By the way, it strips the earthly pleasure out of most other things as well. So, does your pleasure drop steeply from the first eternal kiss to the last? The first bite is always the best if you are present for it and the rest can be really good too if you slow down to enjoy it. Do it slow! And enjoy!
SLOW DOWN, YOU MOVE TOO FAST, YOU´VE GOT TO MAKE THE MOMENT LAST … stepping on the breaks, aargh!!! Aargh!!! Aargh!!! Aargh!!!
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ALL MY EFFORTS: